My name is Gianna Ortiz, and I’m a gymnast at Rutgers University. This is my journey of overcoming injuries and the importance of mental health in sports.
I’ve been doing gymnastics since I was two years old. My dad was in the military, which meant we moved around a lot, but no matter where I went, gymnastics was my constant. I loved watching college meets and the Olympics, dreaming of being like those incredible athletes. In my early years, everything came easily. I was winning competitions and having fun. But when I moved to Florida, gymnastics became much more serious for me. It transformed into my entire life. I remember leaving school by noon every day for practice, and taking online classes to keep up. Looking back, I realize I missed out on many “normal” experiences, but I was driven by the belief that it would all be worth it. I worked tirelessly with the goal of becoming a collegiate gymnast, often enduring six-hour practices and missing out on summer vacations. My parents sacrificed so much for me, and I wanted to honor their commitment by earning a scholarship.
As senior year approached, reality hit hard. I had no scholarship offers. I communicated with several schools, but all I received were walk-on opportunities, with the promise that hard work could lead to a scholarship. Taking a leap of faith, my parents supported my decision. When I began my freshman year at the University of Kentucky in early 2020, it quickly became clear that it was not the right fit for me. Despite my hard work, I faced challenging trials that diminished my confidence and made me question my worth both as a gymnast and as a person. I struggled mentally, and though my parents noticed the change in me, I buried my feelings and channeled everything into the gym.
I entered the transfer portal, connected with other schools, and eventually chose Rutgers University as my new home, once again as a walk-on. Determined to prove myself, I showed up ready to work. I quickly made the beam lineup in my first meet and was in both beam and floor lineups by the third meet. Unfortunately on the last pass of my floor routine, I ruptured my ACL. Initially, my trainer and the doctor thought it was just a meniscus tear, so I clung to hope that I could finish the season before surgery. But my MRI showed the rupture, and I was heartbroken and scared. I struggled with my sports identity, feeling lost without gymnastics. I spoke with a sports psychologist, but I didn’t fully engage, and I made no progress. I focused on recovery, pushing myself to come back faster than anyone expected.
Seven months post-surgery, I was almost fully back and by December, I competed on bars and beam, with my score contributing in almost every meet. Yet, I still felt it was never enough. That’s when I decided to take my mental health seriously. I confronted the struggles that had been lingering since my time at Kentucky, learning to appreciate the small victories, grant myself grace, and recognize that I am more than just a gymnast. As I looked forward to my senior year, I was excited to embrace every moment, the highs, the lows, and simply being happy. I even began training on floor again, striving to compete in three events for my final season.
Then, I ruptured my Achilles. This time, it felt different. When it happened, I sat down, looked at my coach, and said, “I’m done.” At that moment, it was almost like a weight lifted off my shoulders. Despite all the work I had done to try and have a healthier relationship with gymnastics, I realized I was still putting so much pressure on myself. I understood that I needed to break the cycle of trying to do everything alone. I continued working with my sports psychologist, processing my injury and the potential end of my gymnastics career.
Shortly after, my coach invited me to return for a fifth year. I took time to reflect on what I truly wanted, and I realized I still had so much to give. Ultimately, I decided to embrace the opportunity, feeling I had more to give. I’m incredibly grateful for this extra year to grow and compete again. I’ve been working hard to create a healthier relationship with gymnastics. I’ve realized that gymnastics isn’t who I am. There are so many aspects of life that are more significant than a bad day in practice. It’s important to strive for improvement in your sport, but it’s more important to have fun and to not let it consume you. You can overcome any obstacle in your way and mental health is an important part of that. This journey has taught me that mental health is just as important as physical health in sports. I’ve learned that asking for help is a strength, not a weakness so don’t hesitate to reach out for support when you need it. Above all, remember that there is life outside of your sport, full of amazing opportunities and experiences, so don’t give up.
